Once again, it has been a VERY long time since I updated my blog, but I'm not going to apologize this time. I wish I could, I wish I had an invalid excuse, because then that would probably mean I would have written here much sooner. The fact is I have just been too incredibly busy.
Basically my life has been filled by work and by caring for my siblings, along with the occasional much needed foray and mini-vacation to Iowa to visit my boyfriend, Christopher. My mother is attending the MN State Trooper Training Academy at the moment, though she only has 2 1/2 weeks left, and I have been helping her by living and caring for my siblings while she's away during the week. (I've had a lot of help though.) My job has kept me even busier, which is unfortunately something that has led me to some bitterness, but I'm hoping that situation will resolve itself soon. I accepted the position of babysitter/nanny for a 9-month-old baby boy a few months ago, and I really enjoy the job, but I've been - in my opinion - overworked. I informed the woman who hired me - who is a single mother - that my siblings were my first priority, and if she hired me, it would need to stay that way. She said she understood, and I believe she did, and I believe she had good intentions, but her job is such that keeps her at work for many hours a day, so I was working on average 60 hours a week. I tried several times to work things out where Joey, (the baby,) would come with me to my house in the evening so I could be there with my siblings as well, but even that wasn't working. I finally got up the courage to approach my employer with the problems I've been having and explained to her that because of what she has asked of me I have had no time to address hardly anything else in my life. Yes, I greatly enjoy taking care of her son, but I can't do it well if I'm exhausted all the time and completely stressed about everything else in my life.
She understood, and is right now looking for another person to split the 60+ hours a week with me that she needs covered. I just think she didn't realize, didn't even think about the fact that so many hours a week isn't acceptable for someone who has so many other responsibilities. She said that her career has always kept her working that much a week her whole life, so I think she just didn't realize it. I'm still a little bit frustrated that I was the one that needed to explain that to her, but she set to work right away looking for another babysitter to hire so I'm feeling at peace about the situation right now. Even if it doesn't work out, because she might just find someone who's willing to take all the hours and then I might be out of a job, I'll be ok. I'm confident in my decision and in my efforts to make this job work, so it won't feel like failing if it doesn't.
God has been doing some wonderful things in my life regardless, and hopefully soon I'll be able to start writing about them. I have learned SO MUCH about myself and what my weaknesses are and what kind of mother I want to be through this experience; and I'll always be happy that I took this job because of it, even though it's been stressful. I can honestly say that no other job has ever taught me so much. I stated on my childcare resume that I believe taking care of children to be "the most rewarding thing anyone can do." It's so true, and I've realized it to be true in more than one way.
Well, I'm still working the original hours for this week, so I need to go call a cab to pick me up. I usually take the bus, but too many accidents this morning in the house kept me from getting out the door in time.
More updates coming soon. May my Father give me strength and patience today.
